Lose's

It is a year ago now that my mother was in the hospital. In fact it was about this time we were determining if it was time to take her off life support. With this thought I have been doing alot of thinking of the various loses I have experienced over the last few years, since Natalee has been born. First I lost my sister to cancer and with that lose, I also lost the connection to my nieces and their family. My family had begun to shrink. Shortly there after Dave lost his job, which then caused us to move to Cleveland, leaving behind some very very dear friends. We still miss many of them to this day. We love Cleveland but having history with our friends in Michiana makes life easier when the rough times hit. Then after living here about 18 months my Mom was diagnosed with Vasculitis and MAI. She endure about 2 years of treatments and illnesses only to pass year ago this month. While all this was going on, we tried twice to add another child to our family. We endured the lose of two failed IVF's.

It is very hard to watch your family disappear before your eyes. Now I am trying to figure out how to re-create family connections for myself and my daughter, who desperately wants more family. She wants to have sisters and brothers. I know with time I will figure this out. But it doesn't make this that much easier.